Whether you’re swiping on your favorite dating app or talking to potential dates in real life, the search for love can feel like a full-time job. And if the whole process is wearing you down, it’s time to recognize and deal with dating burnout. The good news is, this common phenomenon can be prevented and overcome with a bit of self-care. We spoke to experts to get their tips for dealing with dating burnout and getting back out there.
When you first start dating, there’s a high that comes from the initial excitement of meeting someone new and having the opportunity to potentially connect with a potential long-term partner. However, it’s important to balance this with realism. This means being aware that relationships take time to develop and avoiding unconsciously setting yourself up for disappointment by creating and attaching to “future memories” of scenarios that haven’t happened yet. This will help prevent you from getting burnt out by not expecting your perfect match to be found on day one.
Dating burnout can also be caused by a lack of common ground with potential partners or an inability to identify and articulate your own needs in a relationship. It’s also possible to burn out by putting too much pressure on yourself to find a partner as well as spending too much time on the phone or in person with people who aren’t a good fit for you.
The symptoms of dating burnout can include feelings of irritability and cynicism, an inability to get excited about the potential for love, or a feeling that you’re just over it all altogether. And if you’re experiencing all of these symptoms, it’s time to take a step back from dating and find ways to recharge.
Ultimately, dating burnout can happen to anyone. And if you’re not careful, it can affect the quality of your relationships and even lead to the desire to leave the dating game entirely. But with the right strategies and a little self-care, you can recover from dating burnout and return to the dating scene feeling reenergized.
We spoke to dating and relationship experts to learn their tips for recovering from dating burnout and getting back out there. Keep reading for their best advice.
This article was originally published on AARP’s The Boomer Guide to Love. It has been updated.
Have you ever wanted to throw your smartphone into a river after an unpleasant texting exchange with a date or considered moving to a remote village and swearing off love forever? That was probably a sign of dating burnout.
Dating burnout is a distinctly modern phenomenon caused by too much time spent searching for the one and not enough time actually having them. It can occur anytime daters feel overworked and disillusioned by the process, says a clinical social worker and certified sex therapist. It can also happen when the excitement of swiping and the high of a first date wear off, and you’re left with an empty feeling in your gut.